Wednesday, April 22, 2009

I Thought I Could Trust The Voters (Dancing With The Stars Rant)

Alright, which of you mutton-headed nimwits voted for that whining pansy partner of Julianne Hough? I mean, yes, Julianne is the perfect little girl next door hottie who, oh by the way, happens to have talent oozing out of all her pores. On the dance floor, she knows what she is doing. Her singing is good (even though I'm not a fan of her songs so far).

But this nimwit she is partnered with, both in public and in her personal life, is really a big whiney baby. Yes, dancing is hard. Yes, the judges actually do judge sometimes (more on that below). And yes, if you do not do the moves to the music and in the right way, then you are not going to get rewarded. And yes, its physical, yes it will hurt at times, and yes, your girl friend is the expert so why don't you shut lil mouth and do what the expert tells you to do.

And yet, the American viewers keep bringin Chuck Wicks back. Are you kidding me? The judges gave him a gift because Julianne did a very smart thing in the choreography: she kept the attention on her, but made sure that Wicks had just enough so that Len would not notice what she was doing.

Please, end the madness. Stop voting for Julianne, its forcing the rest of us to suffer through more of Mr. Wicks. And that is just ridiculous.

Now, about the judging. There seems to be a bit of favoritism going on. My wife first twigged to this. I'm not sure its overt, but it jsut feels like certain of the stars are getting preferential scoring. The one my wife points to is Melissa Rycroft. After watching for a couple of weeks (although not this past week, this past week she got, in my opinion the right score) it seemed like they were giving a her a bit of a pass. On the one hand, it could be that they feel bad that she did not have all the prep time that the rest of the stars had but then again, maybe someone is whispering in their ear? If so.. at least she colorably could be worthy of going this far. However, the performance this week showed she was really supposed to be where she is.

Now, over the past few weeks, the various couples have been going through their own doledrums. With LT out, the weak members of the herd should be Wicks and Ty Murray.

I think you know how I feel about Wicks. Julianne, stick around, do some stuff with the other pros, but please, do us all a favor and take out the garbage!

Now, where Wicks is just a baby, Murray has continually put his best out there and been willing to learn. This is a guy who is so out of his comfort level, that sometimes the look on his face makes me feel bad. He does not move well and he always seems stiff. But damn, if he doesn't put his best effort in every time. I can't see him making the finals, but please, please reward this man by voting off the crybaby Wicks next week!

Now, in the past, I have put Giles and Shawn as the favorites. Giles continually shows that he deserves that. However, Shawn has slipped a little bit. In the two weeks before this, her routines just did not go over well. In particular, the rhumba fell flat and cost her. I'm not saying it was bad, it just did not play to her strengths. However, this week, she got back to something a bit more uptempo and flirty. And that works for her. If she can build on this week, she goes back into the top two. If she stumbles next week, then its going to leave it open for Lil Kima and Melissa to come charging in to fill the spots.

At this point, Giles just needs to hold steady, trust Cheryl to teach him. Cheryl, on the other hand, when she gets Giles to the open dance (because seriously, if America votes him off, this couple has shown they deserve to go that far), she just needs to worry about coming up with something to top the Drew "Save a Horse" Lachey routine from a few seasons back. Aww hell, watch it again why not?

Now, the challengers to the top spots are Lil Kim and Melissa Rycroft. Melissa is not a surprise, at least not after the first week. Lil Kim on the other hand is the big surprise for me. When I saw the lineup, I thought she was going to be hard to teach and resistant to doing this. I mean after all, she is Lil Kim, diva, performer, and, unfortunately, ex-con.

However, Derek Hough must be some sort of genius for figuring out how to teach her and coach her so that she's acting more like an athlete star rather than a music/acting star. If Shawn slips, and Melissa isn't ready to pounce, Lil Kim is a real threat to be in the top two at the end.

Right now, it looks like Giles has this in hand. However, if he lets up, fails to wow and goes conservative, he will be in serious trouble because, even though he was in the Sex and The City Movie, he probably has one of the smaller fan bases. Shawn has fallen off, so much so that she might soon be overtaken, I think, by either Melissa or Lil Kim. If this week is the start of a new surge, then Shawn should be able to have a good shot at the end against Giles.

In the end, its all up to the voters. And judging by how stupid you are, I'll probably be stuck watching Wicks stay on to the end.

So to make up for that, how about a picture of some of the female pros?

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