Opening Night Madness

Opening Night is here at last. Here we go.

First up is Chelsea Kane and Mark doing a Foxtrot. Mrs. Angrybell wonders if Florence Henders knows that Chelsea stole Mrs. Brady's hair style while Jan was complaining about Marsha. Its not bad. The problem is the footwork is not spot on, but she's faking the flow until she tried to do the side by side kicks. She has the character of the dance, but her footowrk needs help. She is not getting the heel ball changes.  She had a couple of stumbles. It could stand some improvement. Who is sitting in for Bruno tonight. No gushing. Constructive criticism. Whats up with this? Sevens across the board, but then again she is the first through the door.

Next up Wendy Williams and Tony Dovolani took the floor. Mrs. Angrybell is stunned by her. Poor Tony, he drew the waterworks. And all this over the cha cha cha? Whats going to happen when she hits the two dances. This is not looking good for Wendy. Mrs. Angrybell is shocked by the lack of rhythm from her. She is heavy on her feet. Now I cannot figure out if this is nerves or if we have finally found this year's Kenny Mayne. There's nothing good here other than the fact she managed to stay up right. Six weeks for this? Oh dear. Len's line of the night nominee: "Your dumplings are boiling over." If she wants to survive, if thats possible, she's going to have to get much lighter on her feet. 5s and a 4. They were being kind to her.

Mrs. Angrybell just wants to stay that whatever that thing on Brooke Burke's dress is just wrong.

Hines Ward is going to be Kym Johnson's project this year. She has her work cut out for her. Let's see how he handles the cha cha cha. He needs to get his bum in. Its substituting his bum for hip movmeent, but it gets better as the dance moves along. He gets combinations of moves down and then he has a little hiccups when he starts to think. He alternates between stomping and and footwork. There is hope in this dancing.  Mrs. Angrybell calls for 6s.  Ward benefits from the train wreck of Wendy Williams, but still Bruno scares everyone, including Angrybabybell. He ends up with 7s across the board.

Petra Nemcova is hoping that she follows in the footsteps of Brooke Burke and not Paulina Poriskova . And she draws the foxtrot this week. She's dancing on her toes too much,but its not looking bad. Dmitri and Petra got a nice song for this dance, which helps. Dmitri has kept it nice and simple, and restrained his impulse to do things that Len hates, right up until the end. I'm curious to see what she can do with an up tempo dance. Bruno again comes up with the good comments about linking together all the movements. Apparently Carrie Ann saw a lift. The lift police rides again. She scores 6s across the board. Mrs. Angrybell thinks  at least one of the points comes for being a Tsunami survivor.

Chelsie Hightower is off to find out if Romeo shares the dancing gene his father, Master P, has. Mrs. Angrybell thinks Romeo looks like the mating of Urkel and Will Smith.  He is very flat on his feet when he steps and looks way too serious for a cha cha cha.  Mrs. Angrybell thinks it must be dancing with a frong because his tongue is always out.  He is heavy on his feet and his hip movement is not there.  But that is because of his footwork.  Mrs. Angrybell felt like he was off beat, but a marked improvement to Master P. Damn, Bruno and I are sharing a brain tonight. I amscared. The score of 19 leaves me mystified as to how Carrie Ann went to 7 for him.

Sugar Ray Leonard comes out with Anna. I am curious to see what will happen. They are starting off with foxtrot. Interesting song, Power of Love, never though of it as a foxtrot. He is a little stiff, and his shoulders are up by his ears. This is going to be hard because of posture. Footwork is not where it should be, but he looks comfortable in the open which is rare for an early week dance. He seems to want to put a little showmanship into it. He, like many of the other men so far tonight, is heavy and flat on his feet. If he wants to get better, he needs to get his posture together. Another Lenism for the night "Foxtrot is fine wine and caviar. That was beer and pizza." Carrie Ann once again is the soft touch and gives him a 6. He ends up with a 17.

Kendra Wilkinson is the anchor around Louis Van Amstel's neck this season. Mrs. Angrybell, who was a huge fan of the Girls Next Door, is afraid for this cha cha cha. Of course, Holly did not set the bar that high for her. Footwork is ok, but she is not getting a lot of hip action going on. She looks lost in the open, which is not surprising. Mrs. Angrybell feels like she is not finishing her movements because she is late. She is not embarrassing, but not great either. Louis is not making this easy on her. I feel like he is saying, "Either sink or swim. If you suck, I'm outta here quicker."  It was nice to see Hef and his fiancee out to cheer her on. And Len explains what the problem is, she never got full extension off her legs. She scored sixes for an 18.

Ralph Macchio has Karina Smirnoff to help him. He looks good for being 49. Mrs. Angrybell says "Do not embarass the Italians!" The Irish/Lithuanians in the audience couldn't care. He is not bad. He needs to get his steps a little smaller, but he is going big with his hands, but just not full extension on some of his moves.  Karin gave him a tricky foxtrot with a lot of little movements to do. His posture at times slips away when his shoulders go up. But that open side by side int he mid point of the routine was pretty good.  The final spin was not pretty, but overall, it was food. Bruno liked it. Len is right so far, best foxtrot of the night. The 8s were appropriate for tonight.

Chris Jericho and Cheryl Burke doing a cha cha cha. He is heavy on his feet and Cheryl is keeping him pretty stationary. This does not bode well. He is trying to get some hip action in there, but its only when he really focuses on it. He is not getting the steps in right, its almost looking like a jive. Cheryl may have an early season this year if the lack of content for him is any predictor. I'm not sure that Carrie Ann was watching the same dance, because there is no way that dance was a 7 this week or any week. Mrs. Angrybell wants to know what Jericho has on Carrie Ann for blackmail.

Then there is some DJ named Mike Catherwood with Lacey Schwimmer. Lacey's hair has gotten worse. Mrs. Angrybell is willing to take up a collection to put us out of her misery. Finally, they get to the foxtrot portion of the night. Psycho Mike is trying, but he has some problems. His posture is variable. His footwork is, ... well... yeah. I don';t think that the Karate Kid needs to worry about this. It was not as bad a train wreck as Wendy Williams, but who knows, given a chance he could find that ability. Mrs. Angrybell wants to know if Lacey was trying act as a cellphone tower in that outfit. Wow, he pulls a 13 with a 5 and two 4s. Ugliness.

Lt. Savik, I mean Kirstie Alley comes out with Maksim. I'm not sure who is showing more chest, Kirstie or Maksim. They also got the best song for the cha cha chas tonight with Cee Lo Green's F-You. For someone as heavy as her, she moves a lot lighter on her feet than many of the other women. She is even getting some hip movement in there because she is getting her legs to extend. This was not a typical Maksim choreographed dance, since he kept it pretty simple and managed to make her look good in the process. I kinda of liked it.   Two 8s and a 7 for 23.

This is a little unusual. The two best stars (Kirstee Alley and Ralph Macchio) so far are two of the oldest, with a third (Sugar Ray Leondard) looking like he might have a shot at improving. On the other hand, the younger ones are not showing up too well. Chelsea Kane is ok. Romeo needs help, but has a lot of work.

If Wendy Williams is not careful, she is going home next week. Of course, Chris Jericho may want to give her a run for her money.

Favorites have to be Kirstie Alley and Ralph Macchio.